This morning I was on the phone to my sister trying desperately to get my head around the reality of our financial situation. I've attempted not to do this too often since Will's accident. Whilst I've expressed my concerns to family and friends about the enormity of the costs associated with spinal cord injury (for the rest of Will's life)... I've been really trying to get by with the approach of "the universe will provide".
The crazy thing is - I've simply never bought into this line of thinking. Every left of centre course or seminar I've ever been on is always full of people telling me to "ask the universe and it will provide"... "Yeah whatever"; I would think. I'll have a house with a tennis court, a beach shack down the coast and a Mercedes with leather interiors thanks. As if it's that simple! As often as I would scoff at their approach to "law of attraction" they would gently remind me that as soon as I learn to focus on what I want and what I'm grateful for then all will come my way.
Well no surprises to hear I don't drive any sort of car with leather interiors! And no surprises that it was only a matter of time before I ditched my "universe will provide" mantra.
What freaked me out this morning was the research paper I found that cited the lifetime cost of a C5 quadriplegic at 25years old is $3.5million... So when you suffer the same injury at 13 - the estimated lifetime cost for Will is close to 5million dollars.
5 million dollars? "How do I find that"; I desperately asked my sister this morning. All the bake stalls in the world can't raise 5 million dollars. "It keeps me awake at night"; I confessed to my sister. I want Will to live as full a life as possible and I want him to recover as much as physically possible... "But what if we can't afford it"... I now cried to my sister.
Now my sister usually has the answers to most problems... But she just said "I don't know what to do to help you".
I didn't dwell on it for long though, because here's the crazy thing about the world of spinal cord injury... Whilst you're trying to desperately raise excessive amounts of funds and make extensive and expensive changes to your house, there is also a patient who is really unwell... And you know what, Will is really unwell this week... And needs the full attention of both his parents.
It's not difficult to switch mindsets from one of financial panic to one of parental nurture when your child is desperately sick and in pain. You have no choice sometimes but to throw those financial worries back out to the universe because quite simply, there's not enough space in one's mind to worry about both at the same time... And today was one of those days. With no obvious reasons for Will's decline in health and with no medical solutions on the table, all focus needed to be on Will's immediate comfort today.
Perhaps I spoke louder than usual on the phone this morning, or I dialled in to that elusive channel that those "others" on my courses were more attuned to... But the universe was listening... Loud and clear. How else can you explain the incredible gift that came our way from the Shane Warne Foundation this afternoon.
Many of you will have seen on Facebook or in the media that The Shane Warne Foundation made their final donation today before closing their doors and it has gone to Will.
$340,000 may only make a small dent in that 5million dollar figure that was freaking me out this morning... But this money undoubtedly will point Will in the right direction for his immediate recovery... And it certainly will help me sleep tonight.
Shane Warne may polarise many people... But today he did a great thing. He gave opportunity back to a kid who has a heart as big as a lion and a will and a desire that is stronger than most.
Thank-you Warnie, thank-you universe. Your investment will not go to waste. There is not a family or a kid more determined to make good of this situation and when you invested in us, you invested in our whole community... And for that I am beyond grateful.